Thursday, March 3, 2011

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

This sign was placed at the beginning of this post as a warning to the stupid.  Note the word WARNING strategically placed at the top of the sign and presented to all in the accepted color of caution signs everywhere.  (Hint: If you just looked at this and said, "huh"?  Go away, these aren't the droids you're looking for.)

Okay, for everyone else, please proceed.

I work in a pretty quiet office environment, with the occasional spurt of busy occurring at predictable moments throughout.  Rarely does anything happen that would be worthy of mention to anyone.  Today was no different, except for one thing:  

It's true.  The stupid were out in full force today.  It was alarming.  I have no idea how this happened.  I'm pretty sure there's some kind of regulation that prevents this from happening.  I think someone must be organizing them.  But how?  (Personally, I suspect Google.)  Did they all receive a cartoon drawing a letter directing them to descend upon my office en mass today?  This mystery remains unsolved *growls in frustration* and I fear it will remain so.  (I added a motive for my growling just in case any of them were still reading along.)

I don't mean to come off as unfeeling but I'm talking about stupidity: the absence of any common sense whatsoever.  I was severely traumatized by my experiences today.  I may have to go to counseling.  What are the signs of PTSD?  If you've ever tried to argue with a fool than you have an inkling as to what I endured.  Just picture the verbal juggling that surely must have accompanied that experience and multiply it by a room full of fools; a fool room so to speak.

It's an exercise in futility.  The problem for me being that this wasn't an exercise, this was my job.  I had to get this endless parade of mental midgets to understand me and I had to do it in a professional and courteous manner.  This task was becoming more and more difficult as the day moved on.  I wanted to scream at each one individually:

I wonder if I can wear that shirt to work tomorrow.  After all, it is casual Friday.

I leave you with this final point.  The foolish need not waste their time attending college.  A moron with a college degree is like a work of art on a piece of toilet paper, though it's something you can put on display, I can still wipe my ass with it.

* I found all these pictures HERE.  Thanks Google!  Sorry about the finger pointing earlier.


  1. Sometimes I fear that the land of the stupid people may be trying to recruit me!! One time I pronouced a customers name wrong... REALLY WRONG. Turns out Cataldo is NOT pronounced as Cattle Doo! Who woulda thought??

  2. I have my stupid days and have friends kind enough to bitch slap it right out of me. There are days though that it is worth getting up in the morning to view and witness some people's stupidity.

  3. This happens to me, too. And the environment I work with are high strung people. It's a noisy office. I need an ipod if I am going to work and attempt to accomplish something. :)

  4. sometimes i'm really glad i don't work with people anymore. i prefer the company of myself.

  5. Some days I think they are there to make me realize how gifted I am. ;)

    But I am with you on other days! :(

    Hope tomorrow holds a good mix of visitor for you...

  6. The trouble with The Stupid is that they make perfect sense... to themselves. That's scary.

  7. @ MMW...that's not stupid, clearly it should be pronounced cattle doo. You should see how much I giggle when I speak with Mr. Buttram!

    @ Nubian...I can enjoy stupidity as long as it isn't a way of life. We all have our moments but when stupidity/foolishness is the norm, it is beyond my tolerance levels. You must have some great friends too!

    @ mice...high strung people mixed in with The Stupid? I would be drooling in a corner, sucking my thumb. You are 2 stronger person than I.

    @ off!

    @ Shopgirl...most of the time things are great here. I have great clients and enjoy interacting with them but yesterday was just bizarre. I must admit that I did feel a sense of intellectual superiority while dealing with them.

    @ Bub...that's exactly my point. It's outright terrifyin.

  8. Nari, pssst, it's a surprise.

    If you get this in time, can you remove it from B-day girl? You're obviously invited :)

    I've seen your comments around, I'll be back to read.

  9. I think we're both following behind the crazy truck... :)

    I found out at 430 pm tonight I needed to be at work tomorrow. NO ONE bothered to tell me that they needed me to work. NO ONE.

    Bags of Stupid... just another product delivered by the USPS. :)

  10. @ AC...comment removed. I've always been known for putting my foot in my mouth but this is the first time I'm aware of that I put my foot in my laptop. I hope it was corrected in time.

    @ Julianna...I feel your pain and suffer with you. Hopefully, we can wade through all of this Stupid a little faster together. Just don't let go of my hand.

  11. Nari, thank you, no harm done whatsoever. Nice save. Well done.
    Picture this: right now it's a bunch of guys with various posts on "fairies", waiting while she celebrates in real life. :)

  12. P.S. Have a happy, free from stupid-free people, weekend.

  13. @ AC...I love it. You are clearly both thoughtful and diabolically ingenius. And my weekend plans are to stay indoors as much as possible so I'm pretty safe as long as I don't answer the phone without checking caller ID.

  14. Good plan. I just told a newspaper telemarketer that I can't read. *evil laugh*

    Thank you again, the party is going well.:)

  15. Oh yeah. This so reminds me of my days in banking it's not funny. Well... yeah it is funny the way you tell it. All the same, I have to try not to end up rocking back & forth in a corner sucking my thumb as the memories come flooding back.

    So... much... stupid...

  16. @ AC...I used to let my Girls, when they were little, have the phone when the telemarketers would call. I would give them a book and let them practice reading aloud over the phone. Now, the Hubby just messes with them for fun, flirting with the male ones or pretending he's a girl (he has a super deep voice) and then crying when they forget and call him sir.

    @ Vinny...I'm glad to know you can sympathize and I do spend a lot of time with a soggy thumb and the carpet has become a little worn in the corner.